Sunday, January 11, 2009

The Steinways - "Gorilla Marketing"



In May, I promised Ace from Astoria, New York's The Steinways that I'd review his band's newest release, "Gorilla Marketing." I feel bad it's taken so long. Blah blah blah, let's get to the album.
To give you an idea of what this pop-punk gem may sound like, only three of 16 tracks are over two minutes long, rendering it short, fast and sweet.
What are the songs about? Well, mostly (Asian) girls...but there are a few about other things like (masturbating at) work, smoking weed and well, you get the point. These goofs are catchy with their poppy hooks and you'll find yourself keeping your ears stuck on any given lead singer's words as s/he tells stories of heartache and losing out with chicks. Guitarist Ace sings on "Oh My Fucking Gosh," a song about how he got with a girl while him and his girlfriend and him were on a break. So the song's basically about how this chick (A-m-a-n-d-a H-o-p-p-e-r) kept yelling at him and ultimately got him in trouble.
"Good Grief" is another Ace song, which also rules. Needless to say, it's a catchy tune. A catchy tune about how he wants a girl to pay him attention, with hopes of making out with her later on. I think all of us dudes can relate to these songs. If you are or were a total dork intimidated by the opposite sex and shy as hell, you'll probably empathize real easily. If you've ever thought to yourself, "FUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCK! I should have said something to her. Now she'll NEVER know I like her...oh well," then you'll dig most of these songs. Especially if you're into the pop-punk. Because that's what this awesome album is.
Bassist Michelle sings with lead singer/guitarist Grath on "It's My Hair." This one's about wanting to just get out because things aren't going that great. That's what I got out of it anyways.
"(Nobody Wants To) Make Out (With Me Because I Wear Sweatpants)" is one of the last tunes on the album. It's interesting because unlike all the other ones, this one is set in the past. Well...farther back than all the other songs. Grath reflects on the past and takes us back to a Friday night middle school mixer, where he's dressed in an LA Raiders sweatsuit, eyes fixated on a girl in green tights. He's nervous, with his thick glasses as he watches everyone make out with the girl of his prepubescent dreams.
You know, there's a lot of teen and preteen angst buried in this album. I dig it because I think a little bit of that lies in each of us somewhere. Sure there's the ADULT angst, but that infantile sort of immature, unrational way of thinking resides in us all as hearts circle our heads at any given time in our lives. The heart clouds the brain. And that's the message this album conveys to its listeners. Ace, Grath, Michelle and Chris: You guys popped out a good one. It's an album that's fast-paced, fun to listen to, fun to sing along with and fun to just find that place in your memory where you were that total dork with your big glasses drooling over the hottest chick in school. Who cares if you never had a chance with her in the first place, because IF it happened, it would have been so fucking rad. But screw her, there's always the next one. Yeah, I'll TOTALLY talk to the next one.
Fans of old Green Day, The Ergs!, Screeching Weasel and Chixdiggit! will dig this one. Also, check out their first album, "Missed the Boat." It's really, really good. I think I actually like it better than "Gorilla Marketing," which is saying a lot because I really enjoy this album. Check it out!

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